Archives

Raw and Real #11 – Relate

After much time working out the “Soundtrack of My Life”, I began to HEAR people in a different way.

Before, I had heard their stories; but to be truthful, said “So what?”

I mean I was sorry, but I had my own issues to deal with right?

Somewhere well into my process though, I found that our stories crossed in many ways.

I was not the only one.

I began to RELATE the stories I was hearing, to the stories I had lived, and from there, I was able to RELATE to the person telling the stories.

It may not sound like much, but as I listened, I found I could help somehow.

Sometimes, it was just by showing up.

Sometimes it was a knowing look.  

Sometimes I could not stop the tears from leaking from my eyes.

Other times it was a gentle touch on the hand.

Sometimes it was a hug.

Whichever one it was, we were RELATEing.

“Hugs” by Isabel Bloom

Do you know how much healing there can be by just knowing you are not alone?

Of course you do.

But do you KNOW you’re not alone?

Have you found the one that you can RELATE to?

Our world seems to think that everyone has to like us, understand us, agree with us; this is so not true.

You know what?

I learned that I can RELATE with anyone, even if we come from different worlds.

Why?

Because we all feel pain sometimes, and we all just need one person to notice us.

When I was young, and going through “un-talk-about-ables”, my only wish was to be invisible, so that maybe those things would stop happening.

But maybe being visible to even one person, the right one person, much of my pain could have been avoided.

To that, I can RELATE.

It became my goal to somehow become that person.

One who can honestly say, “I see you”, and “You matter”.

Now, I am a dyed in the wool INFJ. →INFJ here.

An introvert.

I’m not shy, but I prefer my times of peace and quietude.

Here is what makes me unique; I am NOT a fair weather friend.

(a person who stops being a friend in times of difficulty.)

In fact, I am quite the opposite.

I claimed the term “Rainy day friend” for myself.

(Rainy day friends are the ones who listen to us when life is difficult, and remain faithful in friendship and relationship when the rest of the world turns their back to us.)

(Hmm. I thought I made that up until I Googled it)

At any rate, I will come out of my quietness when summoned to help with a problem.

I am tenacious.

I do not give up or give in.

That being said, when the answer is found, when you have been heard, when our RELATEing has brought an answer to your anxiety, some sanity to your chaos, some relief to your pain, I’ll be on my way back to my own stuff.

I am so blessed to have gotten this gift from all that I’ve experienced.

We all need someone with which we can RELATE.

Not a hundred some ones, not fifty some ones, maybe not even a handful of some ones, maybe just one.

Remember this; Jesus was followed by masses of people.

He personally taught twelve, hung out privately with three, but really only RELATEd fully with His Father in Heaven.

My personal belief is that the last is the most important, but truth be told, the three is probably the one we should hope for here on earth.

(Unless your one is God!)

So do this please;

Redo your soundtrack.

After you do, or even while you’re doing it, find someone to RELATE your learnings to.

It will be a great help to you both.

Don’t be invisible – the world needs you now!

Next time join me for  Raw and Real #12 – Freedom.

Until then …

Friday Favorites – What’s Next?

I have been enjoying doing series’s of blog posts.

Hopefully, they have been of some help, hope, encouragement, and fun for you as well.

The end of the Raw and Real series is coming up soon.

So here in this post I’d like to ask for your help.

What would YOU enjoy?

What would YOU like to see as a series?

What will help YOU out?

What will make YOU think?

What will make YOU smile?

What will make YOU comment?

I’m sharing a list of the series’ I’ve placed on this blog.

Please let me know what YOU would like to see!

5 for 5 Brain Dump Challenge←        

Growing Up Churched

Personalities Series x 5

Digital Time Out Memes x 5

Israel Trip Photo Journal Begins Here

Union Station – St. Louis – Photo Journal

Thanksgiving Vacation – Photo Journal

I look forward to hearing from YOU.

Until next time …

Raw and Real #10 – Travel

So just what exactly does travel have to do with raw and real anyway you might ask.

At first blush, nothing.

I know for me it has something very important to do with my process.

I’ll see if I can explain, and you can see if this fits for you as well.

When I was small, the big event of the week was to go and visit my grandparents’ house, which was out of town.

In adult terms, only fifteen miles or so, but to a child, it was SO far.

Regardless of the distance, traveling down that gravel road approaching their home, was the best feeling of all.

There were cousins to play with, horses to pet, barns to hide in and apple trees to climb.

Do you see what was missing?

You saw correctly if you saw that → There were no bullies.

For that time, I was free from the daily torment of those bully boys and the mean girls. 

With my cousins living across just across the road, it was as close to perfect as could be.

Until it wasn’t.

A misunderstanding between my father, my grandfather, and myself, got me the biggest beating of my life,

and an excommunication from my grandparents’ property.

Later on in years, around the age of receiving a driver’s license, travel was important for about the same reasons.

The bullies, the mean girls, and some others who won’t be mentioned, were left behind while I escaped from them for a little while.

When newly married, and having small children, my husband and I lived in the middle of an average sized mid-western town.

We purchased a camper, and a membership to a campground some forty miles away.

Away we would travel; there was peace and quiet for us all.

During those times, I always believed – in my dreams – that I/we could travel away and all, things would be left behind.

The biggest issue, was always having to return, back to the scene of the crime you might say.

The peace and quiet was physical, but I began to realize that peace was an “Inside job”.

My then, unbeknownst to me, introverted self, began taking a look inside, with the help of a pastor/mentor friend of mine.

He showed me how to read the Word of God, the Holy Bible, and glean out of it the →help I needed for myself.

My hope is that perhaps this little series might give you some ideas, and bring the same help to you.

We are all different, some of what worked for me may help, or you may need to look at some other ideas.

The above mentioned mentor has through the years, shown me multiple ways, to help with that “Inside job”.

You can read more from him →here if you like.

Meanwhile, travelling back to the point.

When you’re younger, you travel short distances, or you travel just “In your mind”.

As adults, who want to not only be free, but be useful in the lives of those they love, and in society in general.

We must learn to travel to that inside place.

Psalms 139 calls it “my inward parts”, “in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth”.

What I know to be true, is that if God took that much care in creating us, then He will surely take care to help us with those parts.

He longs for us to be free.

We need only ask.

Nowadays, when I travel, it is because I want to go somewhere.

I want to see something new.

I want to spend some good times with my family and friends.

I don’t travel because I’m trying to get away from bullies.

There is peace within.

Even if I see turmoil in the earth, the peace within me still abides.

How about you?

Where do you want to travel?

Why do you want to travel?

Consider.

Just consider, to find peace within, and peace without.

Join me next time for installment #11 – Relate.

Until next time …