Tag Archive | Story

Raw and Real #11 – Relate

After much time working out the “Soundtrack of My Life”, I began to HEAR people in a different way.

Before, I had heard their stories; but to be truthful, said “So what?”

I mean I was sorry, but I had my own issues to deal with right?

Somewhere well into my process though, I found that our stories crossed in many ways.

I was not the only one.

I began to RELATE the stories I was hearing, to the stories I had lived, and from there, I was able to RELATE to the person telling the stories.

It may not sound like much, but as I listened, I found I could help somehow.

Sometimes, it was just by showing up.

Sometimes it was a knowing look.  

Sometimes I could not stop the tears from leaking from my eyes.

Other times it was a gentle touch on the hand.

Sometimes it was a hug.

Whichever one it was, we were RELATEing.

“Hugs” by Isabel Bloom

Do you know how much healing there can be by just knowing you are not alone?

Of course you do.

But do you KNOW you’re not alone?

Have you found the one that you can RELATE to?

Our world seems to think that everyone has to like us, understand us, agree with us; this is so not true.

You know what?

I learned that I can RELATE with anyone, even if we come from different worlds.

Why?

Because we all feel pain sometimes, and we all just need one person to notice us.

When I was young, and going through “un-talk-about-ables”, my only wish was to be invisible, so that maybe those things would stop happening.

But maybe being visible to even one person, the right one person, much of my pain could have been avoided.

To that, I can RELATE.

It became my goal to somehow become that person.

One who can honestly say, “I see you”, and “You matter”.

Now, I am a dyed in the wool INFJ. →INFJ here.

An introvert.

I’m not shy, but I prefer my times of peace and quietude.

Here is what makes me unique; I am NOT a fair weather friend.

(a person who stops being a friend in times of difficulty.)

In fact, I am quite the opposite.

I claimed the term “Rainy day friend” for myself.

(Rainy day friends are the ones who listen to us when life is difficult, and remain faithful in friendship and relationship when the rest of the world turns their back to us.)

(Hmm. I thought I made that up until I Googled it)

At any rate, I will come out of my quietness when summoned to help with a problem.

I am tenacious.

I do not give up or give in.

That being said, when the answer is found, when you have been heard, when our RELATEing has brought an answer to your anxiety, some sanity to your chaos, some relief to your pain, I’ll be on my way back to my own stuff.

I am so blessed to have gotten this gift from all that I’ve experienced.

We all need someone with which we can RELATE.

Not a hundred some ones, not fifty some ones, maybe not even a handful of some ones, maybe just one.

Remember this; Jesus was followed by masses of people.

He personally taught twelve, hung out privately with three, but really only RELATEd fully with His Father in Heaven.

My personal belief is that the last is the most important, but truth be told, the three is probably the one we should hope for here on earth.

(Unless your one is God!)

So do this please;

Redo your soundtrack.

After you do, or even while you’re doing it, find someone to RELATE your learnings to.

It will be a great help to you both.

Don’t be invisible – the world needs you now!

Next time join me for  Raw and Real #12 – Freedom.

Until then …

Raw and Real #7 – Process

So. If you read the title, and came here for an easy answer, I apologize straight away.

There are so many ways to process the events of our lives.

These events may be physical, mental, and/or spiritual.

Many times these events and their repercussions stay hidden deep inside.

Repercussions of continuous abuse.

If we do choose to address them, admittedly, we choose to work on the parts that seem “easiest”.

This generally means a little here and a little there.

Eventually, the hard stuff is what’s left.

What is the hard stuff?

It’s the stuff that makes up the “Soundtrack of our lives”.

It’s the stuff that has buried itself deep in our consciousness.

Being a “Soundtrack”, means that it can readily get played over and over.

What we believe about ourselves is often the thing that has been repeated to us over time.

Repetition is an amazing teacher.

So what of this “Soundtrack”?

Is it positive, or is it negative?

Do we even realize the harm it is doing?

For me at least, I came to the point where I was faced with doing a “deep dive”.

An  →“Excavation” if you will, to get to the heart of the issue.

My belief in the Holy Bible gave me a jumping off point.

In Ephesians 4:22-23 (ESV) to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds.

And in 2 Corinthians 10:5 (ESV) We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.

In the simplest of terms, what these verses are telling us that it is possible to change the way we think.

My “Soundtrack” was full of what every person I had ever come in contact with said, or thought about me, both positive and negative.

Unfortunately, the negatives are much stickier than the positives.

I’m told that it takes seven positives to overcome a negative.

So how does one go about renewing those thoughts, or “taking them captive”?

Scripture has an answer for that as well.

Philippians 4:8 (ESV) Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Wow!

That’s a tall order.

To tell the truth, I had read all of these verses before, but it seems like only when I was truly ready to put them in place, did they come alive to me!

Believe me friend, it took all the intentionality I could muster to change those thoughts!

Here is some of what I thought followed by what God was thinking about me.

“You’re no good” – God says I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

“Use your head for something besides a hat rack.” – Blessed is the one who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him. (I’ll need my head for that!)

“You’re so dumb.” God says I have the mind of Christ.

“You’re so bad, God will never forgive you!” He is faithful and just to forgive me of my sins.

“What tribe you from? Blackfoot?” – How lovely on the mountains are the feet of Him who brings good news.

Blackfoot, bigfoot, gunboats, monkey toes – He drew me out of the pit, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure.

(There is a foot verse for any foot joke there is!)

Now in the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” – “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.”

The only way that we can overcome, is to change the way we speak about ourselves.

We need to believe what God says, and to repeat it to ourselves again and again.

Remember that repetition is a great teacher.

After some time, I began to believe God said too; and my symptoms began to fade.

I keep adding the true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy statements to my tally of positives.

I believe God’s thoughts more and more, and am exceedingly more capable of living a most grateful and joyful life.

Thanks for joining me here today.

If you’d like to read→another post on “Excavation”, you can do it here.

My hope is that you too will be able to change the “Soundtrack of your life” into to one that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy.

  • Psalms 139:14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.
  • James 1:12 Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.
  • 1 Corinthians 2:16 “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ.
  • 1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
  • Isaiah 52.7 How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news
  • Psalm 40:2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure.

All verses from the English Standard Version

Join me back here on next time for #8 – Too Much Process

Until next time …

Be Who You Are

Feel sometimes like I’m being lazy. Feel like I should be DOING MORE.

God has made it very clear to me that I am doing life the way I am created to.

I am not created to act like………. (fill in the blanks with the name of the person you wish you could be like) dress like……………..eat like……………..play like………………..pray like……………worship like…………write like………….minister like………………Anything like………………….. God has told me on more than one occasion that I am operating as He wants me to.

When He asks me to do something, I do it, with very little fuss. (Not NO fuss, mind you, but very little) the reason, I am positive, is because I understand that He wants the best for me.

For the next three posts, I’ll delve into that just a bit deeper.

Join me in the discovery won’t you?