After much time working out the “Soundtrack of My Life”, I began to HEAR people in a different way.
Before, I had heard their stories; but to be truthful, said “So what?”
I mean I was sorry, but I had my own issues to deal with right?
Somewhere well into my process though, I found that our stories crossed in many ways.
I was not the only one.
I began to RELATE the stories I was hearing, to the stories I had lived, and from there, I was able to RELATE to the person telling the stories.
It may not sound like much, but as I listened, I found I could help somehow.
Sometimes, it was just by showing up.
Sometimes it was a knowing look.
Sometimes I could not stop the tears from leaking from my eyes.
Other times it was a gentle touch on the hand.
Sometimes it was a hug.
Whichever one it was, we were RELATEing.
Do you know how much healing there can be by just knowing you are not alone?
Of course you do.
But do you KNOW you’re not alone?
Have you found the one that you can RELATE to?
Our world seems to think that everyone has to like us, understand us, agree with us; this is so not true.
You know what?
I learned that I can RELATE with anyone, even if we come from different worlds.
Because we all feel pain sometimes, and we all just need one person to notice us.
When I was young, and going through “un-talk-about-ables”, my only wish was to be invisible, so that maybe those things would stop happening.
But maybe being visible to even one person, the right one person, much of my pain could have been avoided.
To that, I can RELATE.
It became my goal to somehow become that person.
One who can honestly say, “I see you”, and “You matter”.
Now, I am a dyed in the wool INFJ. →INFJ here.←
I’m not shy, but I prefer my times of peace and quietude.
Here is what makes me unique; I am NOT a fair weather friend.
(a person who stops being a friend in times of difficulty.)
In fact, I am quite the opposite.
I claimed the term “Rainy day friend” for myself.
(Rainy day friends are the ones who listen to us when life is difficult, and remain faithful in friendship and relationship when the rest of the world turns their back to us.)
(Hmm. I thought I made that up until I Googled it)
At any rate, I will come out of my quietness when summoned to help with a problem.
I am tenacious.
I do not give up or give in.
That being said, when the answer is found, when you have been heard, when our RELATEing has brought an answer to your anxiety, some sanity to your chaos, some relief to your pain, I’ll be on my way back to my own stuff.
I am so blessed to have gotten this gift from all that I’ve experienced.
We all need someone with which we can RELATE.
Not a hundred some ones, not fifty some ones, maybe not even a handful of some ones, maybe just one.
Remember this; Jesus was followed by masses of people.
He personally taught twelve, hung out privately with three, but really only RELATEd fully with His Father in Heaven.
My personal belief is that the last is the most important, but truth be told, the three is probably the one we should hope for here on earth.
(Unless your one is God!)
So do this please;
Redo your soundtrack.
After you do, or even while you’re doing it, find someone to RELATE your learnings to.
It will be a great help to you both.
Don’t be invisible – the world needs you now!
Next time join me for Raw and Real #12 – Freedom.
Until then …
“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.”
Maya Angelou. I’m so happy that we know better!
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It’s an interesting reflection that if there was anyone to listen to that younger person, things may have been very different. There just wasn’t. I’m glad times have changed for my kids sake. I think often if they had been as alone as i was and felt i was. It makea me very sad. But again…glad times have changed.