Tag Archive | choice

Playing to Your Strengths

Play to your strengths.

Speak what you are/need/believe.

There are a few things that have been on my mind and in my heart for quite some time.

If you’ve been here any time at all, you know that much of what I write about is from things that I have processed in the past.

I’ve spent a goodly amount of time in my own head.

After all, that is what we introverts are known for.

Well occasionally, some of that process actually comes to the front again, and falls out onto the page.

This is one of those occasions.

One of the things I spent a very long time thinking about was the fact that I was always told just how I would turn out, and none of that was good.

Problem? When a kid is told something time and time again, they tend to believe it.

After all, an adult said it, so it must be true, right? (Kind of like Google today)

Back “in the day”, we were taught that we should always listen and obey people who were older than we are.

“Respect your elders.”

That’s a fine thought, when your elders gain that respect.

But excuse me, when you’re constantly demeaned, (by your own adults) told your faults with consistent timing, and doing right or wrong things “Because I said so”; there is no respect for you.

The damage done internally sometimes is so much harder to recover from than you would imagine.

I often said of those times that, “I’d rather take a beating.”

So; that is what I wish to write about here.

A lesson I learned AFTER the fact, as an adult who was tired of believing I was less than.

Less than in my mind, less than in my body, less than in my talents, less than in my “Station in life”, less than anyone who may be in a place of leadership.

I read something once back in the beginning of my process, while I was raising littles of my own, the idea that we should to “Play to your strengths’ and not your weaknesses.”

I tried to do this with them, and realized, I needed to do this with myself as well.

Ever notice it’s always easier to do it for someone else?

I needed to learn to RESPECT my own self!

I noticed recently while talking to some teenagers, how much some of them spoke of themselves highly, while others were speaking in the negative about themselves.

It made me wonder, who was speaking into their lives, and what kind of things they were speaking.

Really, with any thought at all, it was pretty obvious that they were not all being taught to respect themselves in their hearts and minds.

In John 6:63the Bible says that “The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life.”

In Proverbs 18:21 says that “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits”.

I pretty firmly believe that.

So if all you have heard about yourself, or say about yourself is trash talk, then you will begin to believe it.

On the other hand, if you speak life, and joy, and ability to yourself, you’ll begin to believe that, and that will be the kind of fruit that grows in your life. 

Are you a writer? Write more. Avail yourself of those who can teach you to be even better.

Are you good at sports? Get more, involved, learn more about your sport. Be the best you can be at it.

If you clean houses, be the best dang house cleaner in your town.

Maybe math is your thing. How can you help someone who just doesn’t get it? Do that.

Talk to yourself about what you are learning.

Talk to yourself about what you are doing.

Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t.

Don’t tell yourself that you can’t.

Speak life to yourself.

Words of affirmation; words of affirmation are what keep me going.

That is one good reason why people’s negative words over my life were so devastating.

Do AFFIRM others – Don’t devastate!

Don’t let anyone’s words devastate you!

Think Lovely Thoughts about yourself.

Never mind what others think.

Respect yourself.

You will need to DECIDE to help yourself in this way.

And to tell you the truth, you will have to decide over, and over, and over.

But the more you decide, the easier it will get.

If you don’t like the thought you’re having; Have another thought.

It’s the easiest thing in the world to do – I’ve done it a million times! (Ha!)

Keep on deciding and going and changing.

You CAN do it – I’m cheering for you!

Until next time.

What’s grabbing You?

Who are you quoting?

What thoughts are you having?

What life are you living?

“We go where we look” Tim McGraw

“If you build it, he will come.” Kevin Costner

“Inside of me there are two dogs. One is mean and evil and the other is good and they fight each other all the time. When asked which one wins I answer, the one I feed the most.” Sitting Bull

“If you feed them they will come” Bruce Martin – About church functions.

We’ve all heard these kinds of sayings.

Do we take them seriously?

Probably, but only for a moment.

Then our usual habits sneak back in, and we find ourselves doing the same things over and over again.

It takes some real tenacity to continue on the road to success; whatever you deem that success to be.

What I’m about to share with you is basically the same thing.

Whatever you give you time to, helps to create who you are.

So with the next two quotes, I’ll give you my personal recommendation.

These two ideas were placed in my head several years ago, (2008?) they grabbed me, and have had me ever since.

This is not to say that I get them right all of the time, but it is to say that I have found them tremendously helpful.

The person speaking was Graham Cooke.

First; “If you don’t like the thought you’re having, then have another thought.”

Second; “Opposition attaches itself to what you do not remove.”

So how does this removal work?

How can I do that?

By reinventing your walk in the Fruit of the Spirit.

People spend copious amounts of time trying to reinvent themselves, only to find themselves the same, or worse than they were before.

Only by REMOVING the old thoughts, can the new ones take over.

I refer you to the Holy Bible,  Galatians 5.

The whole chapter is enlightening, but I point you to verse 22-23 which says; But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

Against such things there is no law; simply means you can’t go wrong!

This means to me that there is great power in these fruits.

So here’s the thing;

If in your life you are seeing the opposite; hatred, bitterness, anger, strife, jealousy,

(The list is long I suppose, and different for each of us.)

then I would encourage you to choose the “Fruit” that is opposite of your issue, and

“Have another thought”.

Look where you’re going.

Feed the right thing.

Build a place inside you where the “Fruit” can be attracted to and grow.

Feed the right things – and more will begin to appear in your mind and in your heart.

One last quote;

“You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet, and the books you read.” Charlie Tremendous Jones

I encourage you to choose your reading, your friends, and your thinking wisely.

It makes all the difference.

Until next time.

**http://Grit & Grace: Train the Mind, Train the Body, Own Your Life; by Tim McGraw

** Kevin Costner as Ray – Field of Dreams – 1989.

Well Adjusted?

I’ve been reading, watching and hearing a lot lately about people who LOOK OK, but in reality, they are really undone on the inside.

In the age we live in, if you have a sickness or condition that can be SEEN; say poison ivy, a broken arm, or even the need for glasses or a hearing aid, there is all the sympathy in the world.

If you have a sickness or condition that is hidden from the eyes of others; say depression, chronic fatigue, traumatic brain injury, or some other form of mental issue, people my judge you in a way in which to say “Suck it up!’, or “Just get over it!”.

If you are mostly quiet, there MUST be something wrong.

If you are loud and boisterous, you must be OK.

Neither is correct.

The hidden condition is the one I speak of today.

This post will be brief, and hopefully helpful.

Volumes can and have been written on the topic, but not by me.

This is what is on my heart today.

  • Many of us have become very accustomed to covering our inner turmoil up, by ignoring it or otherwise somehow making ourselves look all kinds of normal to the general public.

“In short bursts, one can create the illusion of virtually anything.”

Mike Rowe on being well adjusted


  • Some do choose to ignore it completely.

They seem to have bought the lie that those things will never be better for them, that healing is just a pipe dream and that it would be better to suffer alone and silently until their days are done.

  • Still others, myself included, seem to be able to keep plodding through the malaise, and eventually come up with an answer.

I call this my “Junk yard dog” philosophy.

Tenacious until I get what I need.

My personal decision was that what God told me in His word was either true, or it was a lie.

God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it? Numbers 23:19 (ESV)

I chose to believe that He always tells the truth, and wants what is best for me.

His word never does say that I won’t be sick – the kind of sick people can see, or the kind of sick they cannot see.

No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper Isaiah 54:17a (ASV)

(He did not say that weapons would not be formed, He said they would not prosper.)

What He did say was that He would always be by my side.

… for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5c (ESV)

He never even said that everyone would understand!

Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. Proverbs 19:21 (ESV)

A friend of mine used these words to describe his journey;

“I just kept playing Bible roulette. (Every day) Little bits and pieces. (Of the Word)     Enough to keep me going until I could breathe again.”

Terry Simester


The Spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives me life. Job 33:4 (ESV)

Can you resonate with these ideas?

Are you tired of holding on to the illusion you’ve created?

Have you become exhausted of it yet?

Do you just want to breathe again?

Will you let your “Junk yard dog” take over until you get what you need?

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9 (ESV)

I hope you’ll avail yourself of the Bible verses mentioned in this post, and that you find them helpful to you in getting you along farther on your journey.

See you next time.

And remember always; You are

Fearfully and wonderfully made.