Tag Archive | heart

A Bump in the Road

This week heavily on my mind, is the fact that I have made some decisions, or a least I thought I made some decisions.

Decisions that pertain to the things I want to share, here, and anywhere else I’d like to share it.

I find myself out here again, on a bumpy road. Trying to traverse the landscape with a minimum of bumpage. My husband is mortified when I make up words, but bumpage is a good one right? I’m positive you know what I mean.

You’re moving right along, everything lined up straight, and BAM! A cloud of confusion, or a bank of brain fog, too many ideas to count all descend on you at once, or none at all. It’s a moment when you realize that the decision(s) you made made not be as clear as you thought they were. Without a clear purpose, without a clear focus, moving forward is depressingly difficult.

I’m not sure what I can figure it all out here, but allow me to use this space to look back and see how I got here, so that I can figure out, again, which way to go to get around these bumps.

My husband and I discuss often, the fact that in the age we live in, we have taught our children WHAT to think, and not HOW to think. When I was raised, I have no clear recollection of either. I remember in school, finishing my work, and then wandering around the classroom, disturbing the other kids. Instead of training me to THINK of something else to do, I would get whatever the punishment of the day was, and a lot of cross words about how I would never amount to much.

So suffice to say, it is no big surprise that the “Soundtrack of my life” was full of confusion and fog and a cacophony of noises.  When you receive these messages day in and day out, you begin to believe them

I remember always thinking, “I’m going to do this.” I’m going to do that.” All the while doing nothing because I did not know how to sort those thoughts out, or how to put them all together to make sense.

Several years back, every time I heard “I’m going to do this.” in my head, then right after that, I would hear “just stop talking about it and do it.” I began to discern the difference between saying and doing. It sounds simple enough, but let’s face it, when you weren’t taught to think, it is a difficult task.

Sorting those things out fell into a few different categories;

  • What people had said to/about me
    • What I thought about me
  • What people had done to me
    • What I thought because people did what people do
  • Is it possible to change these things?
  • Finally, what did God think of me?
    • How was I created by Him to be?

As you might imagine, these things took some doing to over come. It took a great deal of introspection, and internal dialogue. Separating the negative dialogue from the positive. Changing that “Soundtrack” to something that I could really live with, and then, begin to help others to walk the same way.

It is something that needs to be revisited from time to time. I’m fairly certain that it’s that time again for me.

Bumps in the road are inevitable.

How we navigate them determines our success or failure.

If you have read this far, then I imagine that this is something that plagues your mind as well.

Might I suggest, that you take just a few moments for yourself. To be quiet. To begin to sort all that has been stored inside of you for so long? I know that my “Quietude” lately has been must less than what I require. So it is time to begin again.

Quieting the heart that beats inside of us, is the best place to start.

I’ve left a video here to get you started.

I would love to hear your comments, and any other ideas that have helped you to become clear and focused. We’ll have some here on this blog, and help each other out.

How about it? You in?

 

 

My Own Wholeness

When I stand up for my wholeness I ……..

This writing is from my 5 for 5 Brain Dump writing on July 13. If you don’t know what 5 for 5 Brain Dump is, you can can click here to find out more about it.

Here it is. As it was written. Unedited. Hopefully, you can glean some wisdom from it. If you do, feel free to let me know in the comments.

When I stand up for my wholeness, some times others do not understand. Some think I’m being cranky. RBF. I think it could be because they have been accustomed to me standing up for THEIR wholeness. One of my  nick names is “Best Cheer Leader”. I have seen recently, it’s always been for someone else.

When I stand up for my (own) wholeness, I feel calm. I feel peaceful. I feel more energized and less anxious. When I stand up for my wholeness, I can complete tasks.

I have been, and am grateful for this revelation. Wholeness. What a great feeling.

So that is the Brain Dump. It is the first thing out of my brain after hearing the prompt.

I’ve had time now to consider that prompt in depth. I’ve had time now to put myself first much more of the time.

I find that when I take a few moments here and there to put these principals into practice, the moments I spend for myself and others are much more productive.

How about it?

Do you take a moment to be kind to yourself, to be your own best cheerleader?

You could begin here.

For another perspective on this topic, visit here.

Romper Room Do Bee

The original posting of this was posted by me on my Blogspot/Blogger blog, on Sunday, February 28, 2010. The message is still a part of my story, so I thought I would post it again.

…..”Romper Room   Do bee

When I was little there was a show on called Romper Room. The theme song said “Do be a do bee and don’t be a don’t bee.”

Well my “Do bee” and my “Don’t bee” have been colliding as of late. Stated another way, my Do-er and my Be-er have been having a fight.

My flesh says go and go, do and do. My spirit says stop striving. Listen for His heartbeat.

The only way to hear it is to be.

From just about every direction I’m hearing the same thing. Rest. Rest well. Repeat. Be intentional about listening. Reflect. Ponder.

Then, I feel like I’m doing that too much and being lazy.

I’ve really had to ask God where that line is. How can I be a “Do bee” and not cover His heartbeat with busy, and how can I be a “Don’t bee” without being slothful.

It is a fine line, but one that I believe He wants me to explore.

This mornings sermon implored us to put our whole faith in God. Trusting in Him alone to keep ourselves in balance. We cannot earn it or learn it. We have to look (at Him) and live.

I’m looking at Him, and believing that my hive will have the proper balance of “do-ing” and “be-ing” “…..

A lot has happened since that time.

I did indeed take the time to “Just be”.

I have quieted my soul. I have reflected. I have pondered.

And I have heard His heartbeat. Right there next to mine.

I’m not saying that every day is quiet and peaceful, but I am saying that there are more and more quiet days than ever before, and it soothes my nerves, and keeps my heart at peace.

I have in fact, been able to coach a few people in the “Art of Quietude”.

It may not be for everyone, but I urge you to try it. Even for a short time. You can even begin with three minutes!

What you need to know, is that it isn’t always easy, in fact, the distractions get downright overpowering.

But if you want a quiet spirit, and a quiet mind, it is possible to achieve it.

Romans 12 speaks of renewing our minds, I wholeheartedly believe it can be done.

You know the saying, “If I can do it, you can too”?

It’s so true – even my run away thoughts can be tamed.

Would you like to give it a try?

 

When You Were Seven Revisited

Well, as you can see, I’ve been exploring my past through blog posts from long ago.

Why? Because it occurred to me that over time, I had begun to forget some of the look and feel of some of the dark places I’ve been, and the steps I took to find my way home. My heart is to help others to reclaim their lives, and progress to the places that God their Creator created them for.  Breaking this idea down;

  • You were created for greatness
  • Dark circumstances have blocked your progress
  • Reclaim what was stolen
  • Advance to the purposes you were created for

Hopefully, prayerfully, these Friday looks into the past will help create questions in you, and a longing to find the answers you need, finally.

I’m here cheer you on!

When You Were Seven 

(Original post date June 12, 2012)

This past Sunday our Community Hour Class began its summer session; “Proverbs; Making the Wise Wiser”.

During the introduction, we were each asked to answer a couple of questions around our table.

These questions were meant as kind of an ice breaker, and a lead right in to the topic we are studying.

Well they were ice breakers to be sure, but to me one of these questions was so much more.  It sent me on another journey, into the background that makes me who I am.

All of the time I have spent on introspection, I would like to think that it is all finished.

As we have spoken of in a previous post, it will not be finished as long as we are here on this earth.

However, our Merciful Father in Heaven will allow no more than we can handle at any one time.

Each journey into our background and back out again, carries with it another piece of healing, filling in the puzzle that is us.

English: Puzzle Svenska: Pussel

Have you ever been putting a puzzle together and many pieces go together quickly?

Have you noted that in the very same puzzle, some can take a long time to place?

Each of these remaining pieces needs to be inspected.

They perhaps need to be held in your hand, and placed and replaced until the proper

place is found.

If you do not enjoy the process, you probably will never finish the puzzle.

The question we were asked, seemed very innocuous at the time it was asked, but the more I reflected on it, the more I could sense that this would not be over, just because the class was.

This piece would have to be investigated closely.

Here are the questions;

* How many lived in your home when you were seven?

* Who was the warmest person in your life at that time?

Harmless questions right?

Well as the others spoke their answers, I sought my own answer to the question “Who was the warmest person in your life at that time?”

What I soon realized, was that I could not remember even one “warm” person in my life.

Were people supposed to be warm?

The only thing that came to my mind was that during my very young life, we used to travel every Sunday to my Grampas house in the country.

While there, I would climb the apple trees in his orchard and visit the hay mow in the barn.

Life was peaceful if only for a short time.

After dinner, I can recall clearly, sitting on my Grampas lap in his big comfy chair, eating popcorn out of an enamel roasting pan and watching Lawrence Welk.

I believe that was the safest, coziest, warmest spot I ever knew.

When the show was over, it was time to load up and go home.

My heart longed for our return the following week.

Those visits came to an abrupt end, when there was a misunderstanding between my Father and my Grandpa that got me a beating that today would have landed me in the hospital and my Father in jail.

Father never apologized and Grandpa would not let him return until he did.

I never got over the fact that it was my fault that we could not visit any more.

My warm person/spot was gone.

Grampa came to town to live with us several years later, after my Grandma died, and my Mother and Father divorced, but our relationship was never the same.

I knew it was my fault.

I didn’t find out until much later why it had changed so drastically, and that was that I had grown up, and he didn’t feel that hugging or snuggling with a girl my age was proper.

So NOT my fault.

But the damage was already done.

So.  After class, I was compelled to come and go through the family photos left here by my Mom.

There I found snapshots of brief moments of family life.  Brief shots.  Brief smiles.

I also, sadly, noticed that in nearly all of the photos of that time period, the smile never went to the eyes.

That sounds strange maybe, but it was there.  I saw it.

Here are two photos I found of myself.  In one of them, my favorite one, I was four.  See the light in the eyes?  They twinkled.

I think this may have been before I found out I was defective.

See the second photo?  Age seven.  Sad smile.  No twinkle.

I’m still processing what I see.

I’m still examining every piece.

With God’s help, and His alone, I will be able to fully place the truth, and go on to another piece.

Ladies and Gentlemen; here is the truth;

YOU ARE NOT DEFECTIVE!

AND NEITHER WAS I!

Psalm 139:13-16 (NIV1984)

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place.  When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, 16 your eyes saw my unformed body.  All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

 

Do not be afraid of the process.

Join me in placing the pieces where they rightly fit.

Let us hold God’s hands together,

And believe the truth.

John 8:32 (KJV)

32 And ye shall know the truth, and (He) the truth shall make you free.

*

Heartbeat – Show and Tell

 

close up of tree against sky

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

I once believed that if I “thought too highly of myself” it was a sign of selfishness.

                I was told I thought more highly of myself than I ought.

I once believed that stating my abilities was bragging about how good I was.

                I was told I was a show off, and that I needed to stop it.

I once even believed that if I tried to show any of these talents, then people would tell me I was wrong, and that I actually had no talent at all.

                Sadly, they told me this, all through my life, and I believed them.

Many times these declarations came from those who were either supposed to look after my well being, or if not them, then from someone I had dared to step out of myself to trust.

I was taught that “I” statements, should be phrased as “we” statements.

Hence, I would not be attracting too much attention to myself.

Even my journals were phrased in this way.

I may not know you, but I do know something about people, and even a little bit about what makes them tick.

May I just start by saying that when we are small, and then even as we grow, we have the ability to be either weak or strong, healthy or sick, bright or dim, positive or negative.

Of course a lot of this comes from our genetic code, but I believe much, much more of it comes from what we are told as we grow.

“Whether you think that you can, or that you can’t, you are usually right.” – Henry Ford

 Here is a bit of what I already knew, I knew it because these scriptures said it was so;

                Psalm 139:14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

                2 Corinthians 10:5 says that – We capture every thought and make it give up and obey Christ.

                The Living Bible translation says that we can capture these rebels (thoughts) and change them into thoughts whose hearts’ desire is obedience to Christ.

By re-working how I think in this way, I can choose God’s thoughts for myself.

I have it on good authority (God’s word) that it is OK for me to declare what God has put in side of me.

By declaring this truth, I am actually strengthening and re-strengthening the fact for my heart to know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, I am choosing an obedient thought instead of a lie.

When I capture all those negative thoughts placed in my mind, I literally take them, and trade them in. I don’t like those thoughts, and like returning a purchase at the store, I’ll choose some other thoughts.

I’ll choose the thoughts that God has thought about me all along.

I’ll choose the ones I was not able to hear for all the untrue ones that were loudly going off in my head!

 

If we choose rightly, the way we think of ourselves,

– The way God thinks of us –

We become His “Show and Tell”.

What day was more exciting than “Show and Tell”?

When we could share our most prized possession with the class!

He is excited to show us off!

He absolutely loves what He has created!

He wants the world to see!

When we reflect HIS image,

People will see and know that we belong to a loving Creator God.

Now you may or may not know much about this God of whom I speak.

Whatever the case, please allow me to give you some of God’s own words to let you know and realize the way He thinks of you, the way He sees you.

Please allow God’s words for you, seep into your heart.

Please allow them to marinate your person with His extreme love for you.

I’ve given you a dozen verses to consider.

Then you may even wish to consider your own.

(Perhaps there is a little private “Show and Tell” between you and God in your near future.)

  • ·         Ephesians 2:10 For we are His workmanship (poem, creation, show and tell), created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.

 

  • ·         Romans 8:38-39 (NIV) For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation,(nothing!) will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

 

  • ·         Psalm 139:13-15 (NIV) For you created my inmost being;you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. (You are not a mistake!)

 

  • ·         Isaiah 49:16See, I have written your name on my hand. (He knows your name!)

 

  • ·         Jeremiah 29:11 (ESV)  For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (His plan is for you to CHOOSE hope by loving Him!)

 

  • ·         Luke 4:18-19 (NIV) The Spirit of the Lord is on me, (If you love Him, this means you!) because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom forthe prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free (That’s you too!), to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” (You get to proclaim Him, you are not tied to the negative proclamations that the world believes.)

 

  • ·         1 John 3:1-2 (NIV) See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! (Tweet that!) The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.Dear friends, now we arechildren of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is.All who have this hope (Yep. You again!) in him purify themselves, just as he is pure.

 

  • ·         Psalm 103:17-18 (ESV) The steadfast love of the Lord is fromeverlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children’s children, to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments. (Forever for you and your children if you love Him.)

 

  • ·         Psalm 28:7 (NIV) The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts Him, and He helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him. (Even if my body is weak, He can keep my spirit strong! The joy of the Lord is our strength!))

 

  • ·         2 Timothy 1:7 (KJV) For God has not given us the spirit of fear; (Fear not, listed 365 times in scripture – One for each day!) but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

 

  • ·         Psalm 57:2 (AMP) I will cry to God Most High, Who performs onmy behalf and rewards me [Who brings to pass His purposes for me and surely completes them]!

 

  • ·         John 16:33 (NIV) “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (Trouble is inevitable, but so is His overcoming it!)

 

This is all I have for you today.

It is enough for now.

God so wants to make these truths real to you.

Won’t you give Him a try?

 

*

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

 

Perseverance

Another look back. This time to March 11, 2010. Cycle Drawing

After looking back, with the thought in mind about cycles, I began to think that one “cycle” in life that would be of benefit to us, would be the one where we persistently, tenaciously, strive after God.

At times I strive for him deeply, while at other times, my mind and body just do not want to cooperate.

It took many years for me to find out that these cycles are normal, and that if I slow down a bit, rest adequately, and don’t believe all the negative press I give myself, that these cycles pass. As I told a friend recently, “They didn’t come to stay, they came to pass.”

The 2010 writing is as follows;

James 1:4 stopped me in my tracks this morning.

Here’s how it reads; Perseverance must finish it’s work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

I’ve been asking God about some things lately that seem to go on and on and on. When I read this verse, I had to read it again and again and again.

Then I did a little word study, and here’s what I found. There is a “Crafted Prayer” at the end.

The dictionary I used was a Websters, copyright 1989, and the concordance was the NIV Exhaustive Concordance, copyright 1990.

Dictionary definitions; Numbered definitions are from the original Greek.

Perseverance – Being persistent. A continuing in a state of grace, leading to a state of glory.
Persevere – To try hard and continuously in spite of obstacles and difficulties.
5705 – Endurance (patient, great) persistence. Standing firm, endure patiently.
Mature – Having reached a state of full natural development. Relating to a time when development is complete. Involving or arrived at after prolonged, careful thought. 5455 – Perfect, adult, perfection.
Complete – Nothing missing or lacking. Absolute, entire. To perfect, round off. 3908 – Whole.
Lacking – Short of, without. That which is missing or needed. 3309 – Not having everything needed.

Lord, Help me to hold on to You in spite of the obstacles I face, so that I may bring You glory. Help me to patiently stand firm until my development in You is complete. Help me to give careful thought to Your word, until my growth has nothing missing or broken. Help me to be completely whole, having nothing needed.

Let Your glory be shown in me.

Persist with me. Persist with Him.

Nothing missing, nothing broken. Won’t that be glorious?

Amen